Friday, December 31, 2010

Getting the anniversary card in a day late...

So this happened ten years ago yesterday:



Good times. It's not only the namesake for this very (poorly run) blog, but it's also my favorite play in Saints history. Sure, you could go with the Gleason punt block or Tracy Porter's pick-six of Peyton Manning, or even Garrett Hartley's game-winning FG in the NFCCG. All very worthy.

However, before Hell could freeze over, we had to know it existed. And to understand that, we had to be sure there was really a Heaven. But to believe that, we had to know "there is a God after all."

Brian Milne played only five seasons in the NFL. He was a fullback. He was something of a journeyman: drafted by the Colts (in 1996, same year they got Marvin Harrison) but placed on waivers, picked up by the Bengals, whom he played with sparingly over four season, was subsequently dumped in 1999 and then picked up by the Seattle Seahawks. The Seahawks showed him the exit after one year, and that's when the Saints came knocking.

Milne retired after that season with the Black & Gold. He left his mark on the St. Louis Rams, though, scoring a touchdown against them in a 31-24 win on November 26, 2000, and later, recovering "the muff by Hakim." I'd like to think the diehard Rams fans have nightmares about Brian Milne, much the same way I wake in a cold sweat sometimes thinking about Joe Montana dominating the old NFC West.

And with ten years gone by, I think it's time for Brian Milne to receive some kind of proper honor. Looking at his player profile, it's clear that Brian Milne is not exactly Saints Hall of Fame material, let alone NFL Hall of Fame material. But that shouldn't stop the organization from honoring him.

I think the team owes is Brian Milne to give him a special half time presentation to go over that moment in time. Hey, this Sunday's as good as any other, right? I mean, it IS the 10 year anniversary. And while we're talking about honoring Brian Milne, I think the guy deserves the "Joe Gemelli Fleur De Lis Award" as well.

And...(yes, there's an "AND") he deserves some kind of new honor. Something that a guy of middling accomplishment who had such an indelible impact on the franchise deserves. Brian Milne may not hae been an All Pro, but he was an All Saint for one glorious moment. And for that moment, the man should never have to pay for a beer in the city of New Orleans ever again. Call it the "Your Money's No Good Here" Award or something, I don't really care. Let somebody smarter than me come up with a name for it (lights the 'Wang Signal').

Brian Milne is an unsung hero whose moment of triumph deserves high praise for all times. Don't misunderstand. Brian Milne wasn't a man for all seasons. Looking at his record, he really wasn't much of a man for football season. But his actions lifted the Saints and its fans to a higher place. A joyous place. One that fans don't get to experience very often, let alone fans of a long downtrodden franchise.

He brought his exubrance and exhaltation. And for that he has earned not only a permament place in our hearts and minds, but a fitting memorial to stand the test of time.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

NFL Power Rankings (Week 15 - 2010)

I've ranked teams 32nd to 1st, with each team being ranked based on who they could beat on a neutral field. So...31 could beat 32, 30 could beat 31, so on and so forth.

32. Arizona Cardinals (4-10)
31. Carolina Panthers (2-12)
30. Cincinnati Bengals (3-11)
29. Denver Broncos (3-11)
28. Washington Redskins (5-9)
27. Detroit Lions (4-10)
26. San Francisco 49ers (5-9)
25. Buffalo Bills (4-10)
24. Minnesota Vikings (5-9)
23. Houston Texans (5-9)
22. Seattle Seahawks (6-8): Remember, folks -- SOMEBODY has to win this division.
21. Cleveland Browns (5-9)

"I thought you were putting on Christmas music?"
"This IS Christmas music!"



20. Tennessee Titans (6-8)
19. Dallas Cowboys (5-9)
18. St. Louis Rams (6-8): Bradford has not looked the same since that pick-six against the Saints.
17. Miami Dolphins (7-7)
16. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (8-6)
15. Oakland Raiders (7-7)
14. Jacksonville Jaguars (8-6)
13. Indiannapolis Colts (8-6)
12. Green Bay Packers (8-6)
11. Kansas City Chiefs (9-5)

Grace Potter & The Nocturnals from Letterman. Grace Potter is not only hot but knows how to rock out? Winner...



10. New York Giants (9-5)
9. San Diego Chargers (8-6)
8. Chicago Bears (10-4)
7. Pittsburgh Steelers (10-4)
6. New Orleans Saints (10-4)
5. New York Jets (10-4)
4. Baltimore Ravens (10-4)
3. Philadelphia Eagles (10-4)
2. Atlanta Falcons (12-2)
1. New England Patriots (12-2)

Thursday, December 16, 2010

NFL Power Rankings (Week 14 - 2010)

I've ranked teams 32nd to 1st, with each team being ranked based on who they could beat on a neutral field. So...31 could beat 32, 30 could beat 31, so on and so forth. But first...HAPPY FAVREANUKAH!



32. Carolina Panthers (1-12)
31. Cincinnati Bengals (2-11)
30. Denver Broncos (3-10)
29. Detroit Lions (3-10)
28. Minnesota Vikings (5-8): No more rock out with your cock out, Favre!
27. Arizona Cardinals (4-9)
26. Buffalo Bills (3-10)
25. Washington Redskins (5-8)
24. Seattle Seahawks (6-7)
23. San Francisco 49ers (5-8)
22. Dallas Cowboys (4-9)
21. Cleveland Browns (5-8)

Regarding the NFC West and my sick desires to see a sub-.500 team win, I'll turn things over to Big Daddy Drew from Deadspin:

"Anyway, the point is that a 7-9 team winning the West is still possible and in fact likely. I know a lot of people may bitch about it if it happens, but I think it's kind of cool. I mean, it takes a staggering amount of futility on the part of an entire division to conspire to get a 7-9 team into the playoffs. It's a miraculous convergence of shitty quarterbacking, horrible team management, and Pete Carroll. With Sam Bradford getting better and better, we may not see the likes of the 2010 NFC West ever again. So savor the flavor, everyone. You are watching history being made. Terrible, terrible history."

What he said.

20. Tennessee Titans (5-8)
19. St. Louis Rams (6-7)
18. Houston Texans (5-8): I legit sympathize with the Texans. That finish was a true kick to the nuts.
17. Oakland Raiders (6-7)
16. Miami Dolphins (7-6)
15. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (8-5)
14. Kansas City Chiefs (8-5)
13. Indianapolis Colts (7-6)
12. San Diego Chargers (7-6)
11. Green Bay Packers (8-5)

And now, a parrot singing "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor":



10. New York Jets (9-4)
9. Chicago Bears (9-4)
8. Jacksonville Jaguars (8-5)
7. Baltimore Ravens (9-4)
6. New York Giants (9-4)
5. Pittsburgh Steelers (10-3)
4. Philadelphia Eagles (9-4)
3. New Orleans Saints (10-3)
2. Atlanta Falcons (11-2)
1. New England Patriots (11-2): Barring some kind of bad loss to a vastly inferior team these last three weeks, I can't really see the Patriots sliding from this spot.

And this would be Denise Milani, who's hogging up all the world's denim in this picture:

Sunday, December 12, 2010

NFL Power Rankings (Week 13 - 2010)

Yeah, I'm doing this prior to the week 14 games and AFTER the Thursday night game. Note: the Colts near choke is not factored into this one. I've ranked teams 32nd to 1st, with each team being ranked based on who they could beat on a neutral field. So...31 could beat 32, 30 could beat 31, so on and so forth.

32. Carolina Panthers (1-11)
31. Arizona Cardinals (3-9)
30. Cincinnati Bengals (2-10)
29. Detroit Lions (2-10) - Screwed by the refs twice. Against the Bears. Bad times.
28. Denver Broncos (3-9)
27. San Francisco 49ers (4-8)
26. Buffalo Bills (2-10)
25. Washington Redskins (5-7)
24. Tennessee Titans (5-7)
23. Dallas Cowboys (4-8)
22. Minnesota Vikings (5-7): JUST CLICK THIS LINK. Now that's a great hit...
21. Cleveland Browns (5-7)

20. Seattle Seahawks (6-6)
19. Miami Dolphins (6-6)
18. Houston Texans (5-7)
17. St. Louis Rams (6-6)
16. Oakland Raiders (6-6)
15. Indianapolis Colts (6-6)
14. San Diego Chargers (6-6)
13. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (7-5)
12. Jacksonville Jaguars (7-5)
11. New York Giants (8-4)



10. Kansas City Chiefs (8-4)
9. New York Jets (9-3)
8. Green Bay Packers (8-4)
7. Baltimore Ravens (8-4)
6. Chicago Bears (9-3)
5. Pittsburgh Steelers (9-3)
4. New Orleans Saints (9-3) - Still lurking, assholes...
3. Philadelphia Eagles (9-3)
2. Atlanta Falcons (10-2)
1. New England Patriots (10-2) - How ESPN ranks them behind the Falcons after the Pats' DESTROYED the Jets on MNF is beyond reason or understanding.

Oh, and here's a message to Brady and the Pats, and Matty Ice and the Falcons, courtesy of Mr. Johnny Cash: