And remember...NO DISINTEGRATIONS!

Shit, it would take something this cataclysmic to rouse me into doing a photoshop.

Whatever.

NFL Power Rankings (Week 5 - 2010)

Rankings based on neutral site matchups. Team 31 would beat Team 32. Team 30 would beat both of them. So on and so forth.

MARISA MILLER - She's now an NFL spokesperson


32. Carolina Panthers (0-5)
31. Buffalo Bills (0-5)
30. Cleveland Browns (1-4)
29. San Francisco 49ers (0-5) Don't ask me why.
28. Seattle Seahawks (2-2)
27. Arizona Cardinals (3-2) GTFO.
26. St. Louis Rams (2-3) Looks like the local media here has to end the playoff talk for the time being. Thank Christ. Realistic expectations, people!
25. Oakland Raiders (2-3)
24. Detroit Lions (1-4) Better than their record.
23. Cincinnati Bengals (2-3)
22. Minnesota Vikings (1-3)
21. Dallas Cowboys (1-3) Teams 21 and 22 meet this week. Can they both lose?

JENN STERGER - Bringing back the t-shirt rip!


20. San Diego Chargers (2-3) You lost to the God damn Oakland Raiders?
19. Denver Broncos (2-3)
18. Jacksonville Jaguars (3-2)
17. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (3-1) If the Saints can't beat these guys, expect to see them take this slot next week.
16. Miami Dolphins (2-2)
15. Washington Redskins (3-2) Congrats, you won a war of attrition against the Packers thanks to Mike McCarthy's poor clock management skills. Congrats again.
14. Philadelphia Eagles (3-2)
13. New Orleans Saints (3-2)
12. Houston Texans (3-2)
11. Kansas City Chiefs (3-1) Good defensive showing against the Colts, but they should've put up more than 9 points against them.

KIM KARDASHIAN - Maybe she needs to rub her titties on the Saints O-Line for good luck...


10. Green Bay Packers (3-2)
9. Chicago Bears (4-1) Worse than their record.
8. Tennessee Titans (3-2)
7. New York Giants (3-2)
6. Indianapolis Colts (3-2)
5. New England Patriots (3-1)
4. Atlanta Falcons (4-1)
3. Pittsburgh Steelers (3-1) My oaf of a former boss must be like a pig in shit right now.
2. New York Jets (4-1)
1. Baltimore Ravens (4-1)

BONUS: The epic takedown of "Star Wars, Episode I" that longtime "Star Wars" fans/nerds have longed for.

Brett Favre's junk!!!

Don't ask me how, but I've obtained these incredible pics of Brett Favre's junk and knew I just had to share them with you.

Let me be your one stop shop for photos of Brett Favre's junk!!!

Are you ready?

Are you sure?

Here. We. Go!!







Here's a pictures of Brett Favre's junk in the South China Seas:



And here's a picture of Brett Favre's junk at home in Kiln, Mississippi:



And here's where Brett Favre's junk can be found:

Favre-aggedon, Part 7: INterCEPTION

Hey Vikings fans, was it a dream or reality? Did Favre really kill your season with a patented backbreaking interception and then hold the franchise hostage during the offseason? Or maybe this has been an illusion...nah, the ball falls over...IT'S REALITY.

Favre-aggedon, Part 6: You're gonna need a bigger D-Line

It's really a miracle of football evolution. All he does is retire, unretire, and make little Favres.

Favre-aggedon, Part 5: Favre-atar

For all its hype and awesome appearance, it's pretty simplistic when you really pay attention...



Seriously, unobtainium, James Cameron?!? That's the thing that's hard to get to and very rare? UNOBTAINIUM?!? GTFO, dude...

Favre-aggedon, Part 4: Lost In Croc-Texting

Brett, it's Deanna on line one...Shall I take a message?

Favre-aggedon, Part 3: Old Man and the D

Saints v. Vikings on September 9 is going to be epic. Ernest Hemingway EPIC.



Think after Tracy Porter ruins Brett Favre once again he'll have to wear Favre's jersey around his neck like the "Rhyme of the Ancient Mariner"?

Yes, I'm aware that Samuel Taylor Coleridge wrote the poem, but I wanted to extend the maritime theme.

Favre-aggedon, Part 2: Favre Vader

This jag went to the dark side a long time ago, in a galaxy not far enough way...

Favre-aggedon, Part 1: "The Favre Side"

I don't think ol' #4 is getting the message:



You can expect more of these in the days leading up to the Saints' season opener against the Fightin' Favres.