Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Gramatica Chronicles

Hello my friends,

As you know I, the great Martin Gramatica, kicker and savior of the New Orleans Saints.

I bring joy, happiness, and a love of whores and drugs to the job of NFL placekicking. Now there is a potential roadblock to my plan to spread joy to the 'Big Easy'.

That road block piece of Shit is Taylor Mehlhaff. He's not only clearly gay but he's from Wisconsin. That's practically Canada. And we all know Canadians drink shitty bear, listen to Bryan Adams, and dream of raping American women while getting free crappy health care.

Asshole. Look at this douche practice his 'kicking'? How pathetic? He doesn't even celebrate.

Everyone knows every field goal made should be celebrated like the birth of a child, winning the World Cup, or impregnating a coked up super model.

In case you doubt my greatness just look at this 115 yard kick I made against the Colts

Goooooooaaaal! So this my friends is a warning to you Taylor 'fucking'Mehlhaff, " Martin Gramatica is the kicker of New Orleans Saints.

Now excuse me while I go do a line of coke of this whore's ass.

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