Saturday, March 29, 2008

100th Post!!!

Well, I kinda hoped my 100th post would be a treatise on something...valuable. Instead, my parents are in town visiting and I'm left typing late while I listen to them snore in MY bed. Repeat...MY bed. I'm relegated to the couch. I know, I'm an asshole...You try having them visit, then...

Visit this link for Hornets Loving:
Since I love Major League Soccer, here's a link previewing the upcoming season: MLS Season Preview, by AOL Sports

Monday, March 24, 2008

Forecast: While America sleeps the Hornets keep rolling

Ralph Malbrough over at previews the Hornets upcoming week, wonders why CP3 isn't a serious MVP candidate, and makes fun of Canada.

Forecast: While America sleeps the Hornets keep rolling
By Ralph Malbrough

You’ve probably heard the following things said about the Hornets from NBA analysts:

“A team with no playoff experience never wins the NBA title”

“Even though they have a better record than everyone in the West, they don’t match-up

well with most teams in playoff series.”

“Chris Paul is great but everyone struggles during their first playoff experience.”

While the national basketball media has finally acknowledged the Hornets aren’t likely to fade down the stretch in the ultra competitive Western conference, they still don’t think New Orleans is really a capable of a deep playoff run.

Yes, it’s unlikely the Hornets can win the NBA title this year but a really nice playoff run is very likely, especially if the right match-up happens.

The Dallas Mavericks would be the best possible opponent for the Hornets I think.

Chris Paul can dominate Jason Kidd with his quickness.

David West and Tyson Chandler would have their way inside against Eric Dampier and Dirk Nowitzki.

Dirk will miss two weeks so the Mavericks might not make the playoffs.

Golden State would be a trendy pick to beat the Hornets if they meet in the playoffs.

While Baron Davis against Chris Paul would be almost even, Tyson Chandler should be able to dominate the boards against the smaller Warriors.

The key would be Chris Paul controlling the game and not letting the game turn into street ball.
While those two teams would be good match-ups for the Hornets I think Utah and San Antonio would be bad ones.

Both of those teams have proven they can win game sevens and are extremely tough at home.
The Jazz actually worry me more because of Deron Williams. He is the on guy that has shown he can really control and frustrate Chris Paul at times.

Of course standing in the West change drastically by the day, just ask the Rockets.

We’ll know a lot more where the Hornets could finish after their upcoming six game road trip.
Hornet’s week ahead

Tuesday: Hornets at Indiana Pacers

The Pacers have fallen apart on Larry Bird’s watch. True it’s not all his fault but it is interesting that Larry Legend may be sent packing by the Pacers.
Indianapolis has decided they don’t like the Pacers team right now and attendance has tanked.
Not that anyone has noticed but Mike Dunleavy has suddenly started living up to his huge contract.

Wednesday: Hornets at Cleveland Cavaliers

This might be a really bad spot for the Hornets. LeBron James might be able to have his way with the Hornets on the second of back-to-back games. Is it just me or has Cavs management done a poor job of surrounding James with good talent?

Quick name another Cleveland player and prove me wrong.

Friday: Hornets at Boston Celtics

I’m going to give a shout out to the fans filling the Arena last week. Two sellouts and a decent Monday crowd to watch the dreadful Bulls.

The Hornets beat the Celtics last Saturday and Chris Paul was only really good as opposed to the best point guard in history.

If you think that last statement is a bit crazy look up his stats, Paul is literally having the best season a point guard has ever had. If Paul averages 20 points, 12 assists, and 3 steals for the season he will have completed the best season statistically for a point guard ever.

Yet, he’s third in the MVP race?

NBA Media: Where I don’t really pay attention happens.

Sunday: Hornets at Toronto

The Raptors appear to be sinking like a stone in kiddie pool known as the Eastern Conference. I guess it has something to do with Chris Bosh being injured lately but it’s probably because Canadians only care about hockey and beer.

I have no idea.

Do you really think I watch Raptors games?

Ralph Malbrough is a Hornets fan living in Houston. He can be reached at

Saturday, March 22, 2008

David West Knows How to Close

Hopefully the "Ralpha Dawg" watched this game and can write a more complete game recap then I, considering I didn't actually SEE said game. Oh, I followed it online as far as automatic updates go, but I never saw a single frame of the game.

Shit, I don't even have a TV up here with me in St. Louis! But enough about me...

Celtics beat the Spurs, Mavericks and end the Rockets' 22-game winning streak before coming to New Orleans. Momentum's gotta be in their favor, right?


As good as the Celtics are (and the are REALLY good...), they just couldn't close out the Hornets. Alec Baldwin in 'Glengarry, Glen Ross' would be plenty fucking pissed.

A - Attention.
I - Interest.
D - Decision.
A - Action.

Attention: I'd like to believe that the Hornets have the league's interest. Or at the very least, the interest of the team with the best record...

Interest: Are the fans interested? Judging by the reports of sell-outs and loud scenes at the N.O. Arena in video replays, I'd say that's a big yes...

Decision: Will George Shinn DECIDE to keep the franchise in town after 2009? If David Stern has anything to say about it, hell yes.

Action: Will the Hornets have a plan of action if/when they make the playoffs? Again, hell yes.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Warning! Obligatory Soccer Post!

Greg Lalas of Sports Illustrated went to Italy to watch some minor league soccer teams go at it and is happy to report that the American game (The MLS) is better than the Serie B league!! Hoorah! Actually, I'm not sure that's the best news in the world. I mean, sure...Europeans are gonna have the stuck up, "Americans? Bah!" attitude about Major League Soccer, but the league is fairly competitive and entertaining more often than not.

Saying that the MLS is better than Serie B is not necessarily a compliment to the American game, Greggie. I wonder if Lalas' column was really targeted toward the non-American crowd.

Of course, Greg is the brother of Alexi Lalas, the GM of the LA Galaxy ... Alexi's job since getting David Beckham has been to pimp the league every which way. Maybe Greg is just picking up the slack. I dunno...

I also learned last night that the universe is shaped like a soccer ball, AKA a "dodecahedron." Chuck Norris should try fighting in that! (Hat Tip to for getting me there)

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

New Guy, Talk to the Old Guy!

You'd think that not playing a single down in his rookie year would affect Saints' first-rounder Robert Meachem. Actually, it did -- for the better. The former Tennessee wide-out consulted veteran David Patten for advice this off-season. As a Saints fan, I want to see Meachem on the field in the regular season. A) To take some pressure offf Marques Colston, B) Because Patten doesn't have too many years left in the league, C) And we need to know if the team needs another wide receiver on staff to cover for #17.

I'm hoping the young one steps up in training camp and preseason and emerges as a solid number two guy. Wait, that sounded weird...

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Forecast: Hornets a bunch of Ankle Grabbers?

Well, Ralph Malbrough over at gives his weekly Hornets recap. Watching the Bulls TV crew during the Hornets game last night was actually pretty interesting as they went crazy because the Bulls couldn't stop Chris Paul. At one point, Bulls color analyst Stacey King yelled, "Could we at least attempt to guard him!?"

By the way, I'm officially a Hornets convert, we have to keep them in New Orleans if only to be able to watch Chris Paul for ten more years.

Malbrough actually makes a good point about the fact Tyson Chandler is the same player he was in Chicago but Chris Paul makes him look really good.

Of course, it was really hard to find the column with all the teachers having sex with their student stories on lately.

And everything is right with the world...

New Orleans Hornets - 108
Chicago Bulls - 97

Boston Celtics - 93
San Antonio Spurs - 91

Suck it, Spurs!

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Bruce Bowen Looks Like He'd Enjoy a 'Bud Ice' or 'Bud Dry' ...

(Tip of the Hat to Hell Yes, Guy!.)

Back when I was still in college (shit, even now at 27), I'd go into a bar/pub/burlesque house/whatever and find some douchebag sippin' a Bud Ice or Bud Dry. Now, I admit that I was quite the beer snob at 22 ("wait, you're NOT drinking a Newcastle/Guinness/Harp? fuck you, then!") and even have a bit of that venom to this day ... I've calmed down over the years as I've realized that sometimes a guy just needs to get a buzz on the cheap. That's where Miller Lite, MGD or even "The Champagne of Beers" come in. Shit, I've even kicked back a Bud Light once in a blue moon (the expression ... not the beer).

But I have not and WILL NOT partake of the Bud Ice or Bud Dry. Might as well be ordering a goddamn Steel 211 on a Tuesday. Bruce Bowen strikes me as the Type O' Guy to enjoy Bud Ice/Bud Dry on an all too common basis. And I say "strikes me" because, well, that's just what Mr. Bowen does ... he STRIKES YOU. Repeatedly. And then makes the "what, me?" face while you're wincing in pain on the floor.

Look at the photo of Mr. Bowen up top. That smug look on his face just oozes with "yeah, I kneed Steve Nash in the balls...I jump kicked Wally Szcerbi(whatever the fuck)iak in the face like I was Liu Kang in Mortal Kombat. And I just stomped on Chris Paul's softy spot...So the fuck what?"

Well, the NBA finally decided to grow a pair (I guess to make up for CP3 being without for the time being) ... and SUSPENDED Mr. Bowen for one game, ending his streak of consecutive games played. Excuse me while I fire up the smallest violins in the world for you, Bruce.

Hey, I know I'm kinda late to the 'Bruce Bowen is a thug' party, but I gotta get this shit off my chest. It's been a semi-rough week at work and I need to say my peace about Bowen crushing Paul's Balls. I'm a Hornets fan, what do you expect?

What bothers me is that I didn't see (noted Spurs Blog) Pounding the Rock discuss the matter. Either they've already talked about Bowen's "reputation" or they simply didn't think it necessary to go over yet another example of their goon's antics. Whatever. I'd like to invite somebody from Pounding the Rock onto "Forecast Radio" with Ralph and I to have a talk about what Spurs fans really think about Brucey's behavior.

Mr. Bowen, of course, doesn't think he's a 'dirty player' and vehemently denies doing anything wrong to Chris Paul. "I'm a Christian," he says.

I say ... Enjoy the Bud Dry and Bud Ice, sir.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Requiem for a 'Specialist'

Steve Gleason retired Wednesday after a seven year career. The soon to be 31-year-old decided to hang up his cleats after having microfracture knee surgery in 2007 after injuring himself in training camp (I believe it was training camp...). He not necessarily somebody you thought of as a starter, but he was a role player, and a damn good one to boot. He was a special teams guy and I often took to calling him "The Specialist." Maybe it was my attempt to scoff at that Stallone movie of the same name...I dunno. But here's what I do know: Steve Gleason retired and that makes me a sad panda.

Everybody's already written about his famous blocked punt, which can be relived again and again right here: .

I was there at the game. Much beer was spilled and many high-fives and hugs were exchanged by my buddies and I. We all Steve Gleason (and Curtis DeLoatch, too, I can't forget to mention him) the lifetime beer pass: he should never have to pay for another beer in New Orleans as long as he lives.

But I wanted to share a nice story about the time I got to interview #37. I was working for a TV station in New Orleans in the internet department prior to the 2006 season. The station decided it wanted an internet person there to help blog stuff from training camp at Millsaps College in Mississippi. I made the three hour drive up there and was getting soundbytes from Coach Sean Payton and players when they cam down for interviews with the media after practices.

Being a new guy, I was far too timid to really approach a player on a one-on-one basis. At the time, my proudest moment was that Sean Payton said "Good question" to something I asked front of the other media guys, no less! But I was looking for guys to interview, just to get a few quotes or maybe a story out of, something I could put on the station website to go along with the usual XYZ player did this, so-and-so did that, etc. You get the point.

One of the writers up there recommended I talk to Gleason and said he had a real good story about how he was playing with the Saints. After the afternoon practice, I managed to get a one-on-one interview with the guy. While Jim Haslett was still the coach, the Haz Man gave Gleason a call up in Washington to ask him to come and play for the Saints again. Gleason was installing an air conditioning unit or some duct work or something...and just had a 'Lou Brown moment' on the phone with Haslett: "Yeah, coach, I'm kinda doing something, lemme get back to you."

As I remember it, Haslett kinda snapped at him in a funny way and got Gleason back down to New Orleans to play.

Before wrapping the interview up, I'd heard Gleason was a huge fan of Pearl Jam (still my favorite band) and wanted to ask him about that. The new album had just come out and I wanted to get his take on it. Gleason said he really loved the song 'Inside Job' ... I told him I dug 'Come Back' and 'Unemployable.'

It was just one of those moments where I feel like a got to connect, albeit briefly, with a pro athlete. And then to see him make such a spectacular play on national television that forever etched him in Saints lore, up there with Brian Milne, is pretty damned cool.

I know if I ever have a chance to buy the man a beer, I'm not gonna ask him about the punt...I'm gonna ask him what other bands he likes, and probably recommend he go out and buy some Old 97s or Wilco.

Monday, March 10, 2008

Forecast: Saints copying the Patriots?

No Sean Payton isn't spying on teams but he is collecting injured, possibly washed up linebackers like knick knacks.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Unbelievable BREAKING NEWS!!

It's time for the Birdman to fly once again! Koko B. Ware better recognize! Chris Andersen, banished from the NBA for two years after failing a drug test, could be picked up by the Bees as early as today. Things are looking up, Hornets fans!

Ah, reminds me of the good ole days of his appearance in the 2005 slam dunk contest...

(Oh, and in other news...#4 retired. Shit.)

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Saints go Gay

The Saints are the most open minded sexually tolerant team in the NFL.
They love the Gays...well specifically Randell Gay who got nearly 18 million of Tom Benson's money.
Of course I love this signing because I get to make Junior High butt pirate jokes as long as Gay is on the team.
If Gay is fantastic I can say, "That Gay loves to come from behind and turn on the jets" If he plays like Jason David we can all get our fill of, "Gay takes it in the ass again!"
Good times people..good times.
Oh and I covered him at Brusly High School...holy fuck I'm old.

Devery will catch crazy passes (and drop the easy ones) in N.O. for years to come...

"Details are sketchy." That's my favorite overused, purposefully ambiguous media cliche of them all. Why doesn't the media say "information is limited" or "details are still coming in?" Because it implies that said media organization has not done a good enough job at getting information for you, the viewer. But what the hell does "details are sketchy" mean? It's the details' fault that we don't know what the fuck is going on? That's just lame, people.

In other news, the Saints resigned Devery Henderson. On the list of off-season priorities for a Saints fan, I'll bet that resigning "Stone Hands" Henderson was probably...oh, I don't know...18th or 19th on the list, just after buying sun screen for the trip to Millsaps this training camp. Seriously, couldn't the Saints have at least TOLD US they were looking at a CB and additional secondary players? Maybe another linebacker?

The Saints are still in need of another wide receiver anyway. I don't think Devery has been consistent enough to go unchallenged as the number two guy on the depth chart. In terms of need, the Saints need to fill the following roles: cornerback, linebacker, safety, pass rusher, wide receiver, backup QB for Drew Brees and another cornerback.

Well on the plus side, the Saints did cut Olindo Mare and sign Martin Grammatica. So they got that going for 'em, which is nice.

(And they also landed Jonathan Vilma and his trick knee. Hooray.)