Wednesday, November 11, 2009

NFL Power Rankings (Week 9)

I obviously don't have a formula for this, but it's some kind off half-assed "strength of schedule" meets "who would win on a neutral field?" discussion. For the first time, I've decided to add select comments to a few teams. I hope I don't start doing this to every team because that'll mean more work for me.

For pictures this week, I tried to find pics of Marissa Miller doing a Harley Davidson promotion where she dresses as a 1940s pin-up girl for Veterans Day. Classy stuff. But alas, I could not find those pics to download. Guess we'll just have to settle for Marissa Miller in biker gear on top of a Harley motorcycle. Sorry, everybody, my bad...

32. Cleveland Browns (1-7)
31. Washington Redskins (2-6)
30. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (1-7): Creamsicle uniforns, FTW! Hey, hey, Tampa Bay! The Bucs know how to shine!!
29. Detroit Lions (1-7)
28. St. Louis Rams (1-7): I actually think having the bye week will help the Rams plan for the Saints. They'll hang with the Black & Gold Boys for at least a quarter.
27. Kansas City Chiefs (1-7)
26. Oakland Raiders (2-6)
25. Buffalo Bills (3-5)
24. Tennessee Titans (2-6): Uh, Vince Young "just wins games?"
23. Seattle Seahawks (3-5)
22. San Francisco 49ers (3-5): Dude, what's with the scary ass music in these NFL promos? I almost couldn't go to sleep last night because I had visions of the NFL logo chasing me in the woods.
21. Miami Dolphins (3-5)

20. Carolina Panthers (3-5): Grandmaster Wang over at Moose Denied found the perfect photo to exemplify the results of last Sunday's Saints-Panthers game.
19. Jacksonville Jaguars (4-4)
18. Chicago Bears (4-4)
17. New York Jets (4-4): Since playing the Saints, the Jets are 1-3.
16. Green Bay Packers (4-4): Seems I may have overrated these guys in my NFL preview column. Note to Aaron Rodgers: you should get rid of the ball faster than the time it takes you to read this sentence.
15. New York Giants (5-4): Since playing the Saints, the Giants are 0-3.
14. Baltimore Ravens (4-4)
13. Arizona Cardinals (5-3)
12. Houston Texans (5-3): Is this the year the Texans finish 9-7? Yeah, they'll still miss the playoffs, but the fans might just build Gary Kubiak a bronze statute outside the stadium.
11. Atlanta Falcons (5-3): Matt Ryan is killing me in fantasy football, but anyone who says the Falcons are average is simply not playing with a full deck.

10. San Diego Chargers (5-3)
9. Denver Broncos (6-2): Bronco fans would have killed for a first half like this.
8. Philadelphia Eagles (6-2): I've got an idea for the NFL. Since they've imported the two-point conversion from the college game, why not take things a step further and utilize another fun rule? In college football, the clock stops anytime there's a first down so the chains can be reset. That wouldn't work in the NFL; games are long enough as it is. Instead, why not have the clock stop on all first downs while the chains are reset in the final two minutes of each half? It would make for more exciting finishes. I'm sure Andy Reid would like that idea.
7. Dallas Cowboys (6-2)
6. Cincinnati Bengals (6-2)
5. New England Patriots (6-2)
4. Minnesota Vikings (7-1)
3. Pittsburgh Steelers (6-2): And because I'm nice, this is the second half from that Tecmo Bowl prediction game. Don't be fooled by the file name. I assure you, it's the second half.
2. Indianapolis Colts (8-0): I'm conflicted. Do I root for the Patriots so the Colts lose a game? Or do I root for the Colts because I now loathe the Patriots and Tom "he gave me an owie" Brady? Uh, can I root for the refs to somehow make it a tie game?
1. New Orleans Saints (8-0)

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